Mission: Egg!
by BlackGold Ficcies Inc
Summary: The Seigaku Tennis Team regulars, ichinen trio, and some girls are assigned the infamous egg project! corny horror music goes here
1. Meet the couples!

Mission: Egg Disclaimer: Ahem. Look at the summary. Do we sound creative enough to create PoT? We are merely borrowing the characters for our own sadistic pleasure. (ZOMG! Fuji's taken over Tasha's body)  
Author: BlackGold Ficcies Inc.  
Rating: T Summary: The Seigaku Tennis Team regulars, ichinen trio, and some girls are assigned the infamous egg project! (insert corny horror music)  
Warnings: CRACK! Shounen-ai, sugar-high authoresses, death fic (with a twist), Fuji, OC's- NOT MARY-SUES! (They can't be, since they don't have too much personality in this ficlet.) First attempt at a PoT fic. Characters may--no--WILL be OOC. 

Hokay, OC bios! Takita Seimi: Crush on Yuuta, from Osaka (think Oshitari), second year. Copper-colored hair, brown eyes, member of Seigaku's girls's Tennis team.  
Takamori Saki: Crush on Kawamura, 7 siblings, first year. Purple hair, brown eyes, Seimi's unofficial doubles partner.  
Takeda Rika-sensei: Just Takeda-sensei by her students, she's pretty young, only twenty-eight years. Assigns the hated egg-project.

Sakaki: Itte yosh!

Takeda-sensei sighed. She was hoping there would be more girls in this health class. She had the same problem in first semester when there were too many girls. It seems the girls wanted to be paired up with cute guys so they all take it first semester. Boys wanted to hold it off as long as possible. This caused problems for 'it'  
The bell for class rang and everyone took their seats. Takeda-sensei stood up and braced herself for the groaning. "Class, today we will be starting 'it.' The egg-project." She was met with shocked silence. 'Could it be that these students are willing to accept the project with no complaints?'

"What!"

"No!"

"My perfect grades!"

'I guess not.'

"I'll be sent back to Osaka!"

"Is this a required class, sensei?"

"Do we get to choose our partners, Takeda-sensei?" The class was silent.

They all looked back at the calm brunette in the back of the room. The heads turned back to the front of the room, it was dead silent. Takeda-sensei stood calmly in the front of the room with her hands behind her back.

"Of course you get to choose your partners..." A sigh of relief resonated throughout the room. "...From this hat." In her hands was a gray pinstriped hat with slips of paper in it. "Who's going first?" She asked with a smile on her face.

"I will, Takeda-sensei." The brown-haired boy from before goes to the front of the room.

"Your name"

"Fuji Shuusuke." "Yosh, anyone who draws Fuji-kun's name will have to throw the paper away and pick again."

Fuji turned his head away to assure there would be no cheating. Cause cheating is wrong! Good Fuji. There was no noise as Fuji slowly drew out a piece of paper. All were in silent prayers.

'Pick me, pick me, pick me. If he gets me, I can name an egg-baby after Yuu-tan.'

'Don't pick me, don't pick me, don't pick me.'

"Tezuka Kunimitsu."

'Shit! I'll name my baby after Yuuta in a more subtle way, then.'

'Shit! FuckFuckFuckFuck-NO! Don't Fuck! No thinking about fucking! SHIT!'

Groans and relieved sighs were heard all throughout the room. "Did you hear that, Kuni-chan? It must be destiny!" A few soft snickers were heard. Tezuka decided NOT to answer.

Takeda-sensei smiled in delight. "Who's next?" One energetic red-head answered her request. "Alright then Kikumaru-kun." She remembered his name. The one in class always having exaggerated reactions to the facts she presented.

He seemed so energetic as he ran up to the hat, closed his eyes, and picked up a paper. He glanced at it for a millisecond.

"OISHI!" The boy in question blinked as his love- ahem! Partner ran up and glomped him.

Takeda-sensei picked up the paper from the garbage. Kikumaru Eiji it read. She smirked. "Alright then, who's next"

Two girls near the front of the classroom both jumped up, volunteering. "You can both go at the same time."

They ran up, closed their eyes, and put their hand in.The copper-haired girl, Seimi, drew out a name first.

"Oishi Shuichiro?" Everyone looked either back at Kikumaru (still cuddling his boyfriend) or Takeda-sensei (still waiting for Saki, the other girl.) in confusion.

Oishi was forgotten in a fraction of a second as Saki suddenly jumped up yelling, "Kawamura-sempaaaaaaaaaai!" While this was happening, Seimi quietly slipped her paper into the garbage and picked another one.

"Kato Kachiro." She smiled and waved at him as she planted her butt right beside him. Saki had long since sat next to Kawamura, who was blushing and wondering when this first-year was going to stop cuddling his arm.

Takeda-sensei smiled. So far, almost everyone seemed happy with their partners. "How about Echizen-kun next"

"Hai, sensei." He slowly made his way toward the front of the room. Something bad was going to happen, he just knew it. He closed his eyes and put his hand in. As he pulled it out, the class was silent.

He tried to put the paper back in. "Oi! No you don't!" Takeda-sensei grabbed his hand and took it. "Osakada Tomoka. I wish you luck." Ryoma had a slight twitch in his brow as he took his seat. "You are supposed to sit by your partner"

"You never specifically said that, sensei." He shivered as he heard the deafening sounds of his 'partner.' Sakuno was congratulating her.

He wished he'd gotten Sakuno instead. At least SHE was QUIET. It's not like he liked her or anything. She's just quieter than her friend. And she'd go along with anything he said. Instead of wanting joint-care 24/7. Yeah. That's it. Of course he doesn't LIKE her like her, like THAT. Because um. Yeah. Oh look it's Momo-sempai's turn.

"You can't cheat. You just can't..." He said as he turned his head away and closed his eyes. Digging around a little, he finally pulled a name out. "What! Sensei, can I PLEASE pick again"

"That's cheating, Momoshiro-kun. Kaidoh Kaoru is your partner." Gasps, whispers, and laughter was all he heard for the next two minutes. Even worse, he thought Inui-sempai was glaring at him. He sulked as he followed his kohai's actions and sat in his own seat. Takeda-sensei smiled, "How about Sakuno-chan next?"

She got out of her seat and hurried to the hat.

She quickly pulled a name out. "Mizuno Katsuo." At least it's not anyone too horrid, or a complete stranger. But. It still wasn't Ryoma-kun...Other random students went up and by this time Horio had fallen asleep. "Alrighty class there are only two names left in the hat. They are..." She paused for dramatic effect. "Inui Sadaharu and Horio Satoshi!" Horio woke up at the sound of his name. Why was everyone laughing. Did the teacher catch him sleeping again?

"No, sensei! You've got it all wrong! I wasn't sleeping, I was um... correcting mistakes on my worksheet"

"Horio-kun, we are not working on a worksheet, you were sleeping, and your partner is Inui-kun. Congratulations." Partner? Inui-sempai? Congratulations? What was- then it clicked. The egg project. "Alright then, class. Since Horio-kun is making a spectacle of himself, I'll use him to demonstrate how many egg-babies you'll have and of which gender." She turned towards said freshman. "Horio-kun pick a letter between a and c"

To which he responded, "Err...b"

"Now please come up and pick two eggs from the carton." Horio grudgingly did so.

"Wha? they say 'B' on the bottom. Two boys"

"That's correct. Everybody got it"

To which she got a "Haaai."

Fuji walked up, and bowed his head a bit to Takeda-sensei. "C." "That's two, pick your eggs, Fuji-kun. Now remember, A won't always be one, B won't always be two, and C won't always be three, class."

Fuji frowned, and picked two eggs. "Kuni-chan, both girls! ...G is always girl, and B is always boy, ne sensei?"

"Yes, Fuji-kun, G is always girl, and B is always boy."

"Ohh...Kuni-chan, both girls! Can we call them Fuka and Mitsu?" Fuji sat back down next to Tezuka. "Yes, we can. Did you plan this, Fuji?" (A/N: Zomg! Tezuka talked)

"Of course not Kuni-chan. My plans were to have two girls AND a boy. Named Kunitaro!" He smiled in delight. Looking just like a puppy who got a pat on the head. Tezuka silently groaned.

"Kikumaru-kun is next. A, B, or C?"

"Nya, A."

"That's one. Pick your egg." Eiji pouted as he picked out an egg. "It says B, hoi! That means it's a boy!" He got a few pity laughs.

Saki's hand went up, "I'll pick next!" She skipped to the teacher. "B please."

"That's one again. Pick your egg." She sulks like Momo and picks an egg. "We have a girl Kawamura-sempai!" She brightens back up and rushes to his side. A couple more people go up. Seimi and Kachiro end up with 2 girls, Katsuo and Sakuno also got 2 boys.

Tomo volunteers to pick eggs. "That'll be A please."

"Three, please pick your eggs." Everyone who wanted three burst out into "WHAT?"

"Oishi, I'm jealous, nya!"

"I'll trade you!"

"You're so lucky!"

"I'm sorry, Ryoma. Good luck."

"Oh SNAP!"

She happily went back to her seat with one boy and two girls. Takeda-sensei sighed, now was the moment of truth. Time to see what Momoshiro-kun and Kaidoh-kun would get. "How about Kaidoh-kun picks?" He hissed and tried to keep his cool.

"C"

"Congratulations, Kaidoh-kun! Go pick out your three eggs!" Everyone was really in shock now.

"Now I'm REALLY jealous, Shui-chan!"

"Eiji! Don't call me that in public"

"I'll trade YOUUU!

"Geez, more lucky people..." (A/N: Sengoku DID apply to Seigaku)

"Momo-chan-sempai! Daijoubou?"

"OH DOUBLE SNAP!"

In the midst of the bedlam, the bell rings, signaling the end of the first chapter. DON!

EDIT: has screwed up our format beyond all reason, so we are sorry if it's confusing to read


	2. Meet the babywinkes!

Mission: Egg Chapter 2 

Disclaimer: Ahem. Look at the summary. Do we sound creative enough to create PoT? We are merely borrowing the characters for our own sadistic pleasure. (ZOMG! Fuji's taken over Tasha's body!)

Author: BlackGold Ficcies Inc.

Rating: T

Summary: The Seigaku Tennis Team regulars, ichinen trio, and some girls are assigned the infamous egg project! (insert corny horror music)

Warnings: CRACK!!!! Shounen-ai, sugar-high authoresses, death fic (with a twist), Fuji, OC's- NOT MARY-SUES!!! (They can't be, since they don't have too much personality in this ficlet.) First attempt at a PoT fic. Characters may--no--WILL be OOC.

Someone put us on story alert and we have a review!!! Yay! That's what keeps us going. Well that, sugar, and DUCKIEEEES!!!

YOSHA! BURNING!

* * *

KAIDOH & MOMOSHIRO:

"Okay, Mamushi, this is how we'll do this: you take Narumi,"

At the sound of 'Narumi,' Fuji quickly glanced around to make sure Kurumi wasn't around.

"and I'll take Suki--"

Saki, who was walking around cradling her egg suddenly yelled, "My Suki!" She cupped her hands around the egg in a protective manner.

"And I'll take YUKIE! Yukie!"

Saki had a content smile on her face as she cuddled up to Taka, who was about 5 feet away from the two arguing for whatever reason. "OUR Suki."

"...Yukie and Kaira." Momoshiro finished, before being distracted by Seimi, who walking by and singing some song about cameras. "...And we'll switch tomorrow. Got it?"

"Geez, you can't even say their stupid names right. Why do you have two?"

"Who cares? They're just eggs!" The second-year regulars stormed away from each other, and when they were out of hearing range, stroked their egg(s) soothingly. "You know I didn't mean it..."

(A/N: Momo and Kaidoh's girls' names are puns: Narumi was the twin sister of Kurumi, a little girl who was obsessed with Fuji for an episode, then disappeared forever. Suki was obviously Saki and Taka's egg's name. Momo just said Yukie wrong on accident. And last, Yuki KaiDA is Fuji's voice actress, and sings "Shutter Chance wa ichido dake" as him, which is a songs about cameras. And yes, that's who Yukie got her name from)

* * *

TOMOKA & RYOMA/SAKUNO & KATSUO: 

"Kyaa! Ryoma-sama! It must be destiny we were put together! Of course I was hoping and praying that you would pick me! I bet someday we'll- Ryoma-sama? Aaiieee! Where's Ryoma-sama?" She looked around the bench. "Ahh! Where are the eggs?" Sakuno-- the poor girl --decided to see what's wrong with her friend. "It's HORRIBLE Sakuno-chan! I was right here telling Ryoma-sama about how happy I was and I opened my eyes and he was gone! And Ryo and Kisa and Sadakou are gone and Ryoma-sama's gonna HATE MEEE!!!"

She continued her angst-ridden rant as Sakuno quietly slinked back to Katsuo who was holding Kumo and Taichi lovingly.

"Tomo-chan is going through a bit of a crisis. How are they doing?" She looked into his hands.

"I wouldn't call that a bit of crisis. And they're just fine, no cracks or anything."

(A/N: Okay, since Sakuno and Katsuo are boring-- but cute, can you say crack pairing? --we'll switch to Ryoma now.)

Ryoma quietly slipped into his bedroom. Thank god Coach Ryuzaki allowed him to skip tennis practice, and get away from 'HER' without anyone seeing. He put his eggs down, and pondered what to do next.

He thinks Sensei said that they should decorate their eggs... Ryoma picked up some markers. He tried to draw an eye, but it turned out too big. Argh, now the other eye needed to be that big. He reached for his yellow marker, since it was going to look like him...only to discover that was out of marker-ink...or whatever it's called. The eyes ended up being red-orange, since he'd figured orange to be closest to yellow. He thought some of 'HER' genes should be there too, so he gave it brown hair, but far too much. He inspected it, decided it looked too boyish, and gave it two pink hair ribbons so it had small limp pigtails. Well, there, Sadakou was decorated...she looked familar, like someone he knew...Besides himself or 'HER.' It looked like...Sakuno? Ryoma made a "WTF" kinda face before moving on to the next...

* * *

HORIO & INUI

"All right, Horio. As long we just keep switching eggs everyday, the chance of us getting an A is 98.4379." Inui carefully explained.

"Why only ninety-eight? Why not a hundred?"

"Because it could be that Takeda-sensei wants joint care between partners. So today, I'll have Shigeru. Tomorrow I will take Satoshi. Got it?" Horio nodded. Inui then handed Shigeru to Horio.

"Wait! Didn't you JUST say YOU'D take Shigeru?"

"Yes. I did. I gave Shigeru to you because I have to get ready for tennis practice. You should follow my actions and get ready as well, or we will both be late and have to do laps."

Horio stared at his sempai and finally took in what he said.

A few minutes later, Horio grumbled to himself as he picked up balls. "Why do I have to take care of the eggs more?" He glanced over at the aforementioned eggs. They still looked safe in the small tea box lined with Kleenex near his bag.

'I'll probably have to take care of them more during school...Poor things, only having me.' Horio felt oddly protective for a moment; But then he realized what he'd just thought, and smacked himself on the forehead for it--and that got him some weird looks from the other tennis club members.

This was gonna be a long six days, he just knew it...

* * *

SEIMI & KACHIRO

"Kachiro-kun! Pleeeease take care of the egg-babies overnight!" She leaned over and kissed them. "Bye-bye Yuuko. Bye-bye Yumeko! I'm sorry you can't come home with Mommy, but she's afraid you'll get made into a cake." Seimi shivered at the thought of Yuuta's namesake baby 'dying.'

"Okay, Takita-sempai. I'm sure they'll miss you too." He watched as Seimi ran back home yelling her goodbyes.

On the way home he realized that if they decorated the eggs, they wouldn't be in as much peril if they were to enter the bakery Takita-sempai worked/lived in. Yosh! He'd tell her tomorrow.

(A/N: Wow... that was short. Angie: WoW! Where? Tasha: WoW is a game Angie-- and mom, and daniel --plays)  
SAKI & KAWAMURA (Whom I shall now refer to as Taka, since it's annoying to type out his last name.)

"Hmm... will it be more of a hazard in a house with seven siblings, or a sushi shop...?" Saki was pacing around trying to figure out who baby Suki-chan would go home with tonight. Taka was currently in tennis practice. Every so often, she'd look up and watch him for a bit until he caught her.

After tennis practice Saki ran up to Taka and asked him the question that had bothered her so much.

"I have two older brothers, one younger brother, an older sister, and younger sisters that are twins. Not to mention parents and Kenya, the family dog. I know I can't take it home with that many people, and I don't know what to do, Kawamura-sempaaai!" She gasped for breath, and awaited his answer. Her cheeks were red hot from talking so fast, mostly anyway.

"Umm... well, I guess... I... don't know...?" He paused, and thought it over.

"Kawamura. You forgot your racket on the court. Yudan sezu ni ikou." Tezuka reminded him. Taka grabbed the racket, as Tezuka walked away as fast as he could, since there was a call of 'Kuni-chyaaan!' coming from the courts.

"BURNIIING! I'LL TAKE CARE OF SUKI, BABY! GREEEAAT-O!"

Saki was all like: O. She sincerely hoped Suki would be Ok. As she walked off, she realized. 'He called me baby... ZOMGSQUEE! I've got to tell Seimi. 2 teh InT3Rn3t!' LOLERZ!!1ELEVEN

* * *

FUJI & TEZUKA

"Kuni-chyaaan!"

Tezuka cringed at the pet name as Fuji came running up beside him. "Kuni-chan, can I walk home with you?" He didn't answer.

Fuji, being the tensai he is, took that as an 'of course, my sweet Shuu-chan!' and continued to follow Tezuka into the clubhouse. He began talking about things that were new or old things that he thought Kuni-chan hadn't heard him talk about.

But Tezuka always listened to Shuusuke. Annoying, sad, excited (whichever way you want to look at that.), always.

(Tasha/note: I'm SUCH a sucker for fluffiness. And I couldn't help but put the humor bit in. So if you don't like it, there's a back button up there. Itte yosh.)

As they began walking home Fuji stopped talking about whatever it is he was talking about, and asked, "Kuni-chyaaan?"

"Hn?"

"Do you think it's destiny that we got paired up?"

"Hn." That kept Fuji quiet for another five minutes. Until...

"Kuni-chyaaan?"

"Hn?"

"When we get married, can we name our daughters Fuka and Mitsu?"

"Hn." Another five minutes went by...

"Kuni-chyaaan?"

"Hn?"

"Do you love me?"

"Hn." WHAT?!? How dare he just answer with 'Hn.'!

As they were almost to Tezuka's house, Fuji asked another question...

"Tezuka-buchou?" Fuji asked in a sickenly cute voice. Uh-oh. Fuji NEVER called him that unless they were on the courts or Fuji was mad at him. And they weren't on the courts.

"Hn?"

"YOU'RE SO MEAN!" Fuji stormed off in the direction of his own home. Tezuka sighed. He was really going to make this up to his Shuusuke-chan.

* * *

EIJI & OISHI

"Oishi "

"Yes, Eiji?"

When we grow up, let's have MORE than one kid."

"We will, Eiji."

"YAY! Aishiteru, Oishi!"

Eiji hugged Oishi for a long time. When he finally let go, Oishi smiled softly and replied, "I love you too, Eiji."

They were at Oishi's house, since Eiji's would surely be a death trap for little Shuji, with so many siblings and pets. "Are we going to name our first son Shuji, too?"

"Eiji, how are we going to have kids, anyway?"

"Nya! Oishi, don't you pay attention in health class? One of us will just get pregnent with a baby." Eiji smiled and nodded, pleased with his explaination.

Oishi, on the other hand, frowned. "...Eiji, men can't get pregnent."

"THEY CAN'T!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??"

"Eiji, haven't YOU been paying attention to Takeda-sensei?"

"We'll just adopt, then!" Eiji pouted in his usual I'm-the-cutest-thing-to-ever-walk-this-earth way.

Oishi petted his hair. "Okay, we'll adopt."

"Nya, I can't wait to grow up. I'll be dreaming about it tonight!" Eiji snuggled into his boyfriend's chest and was asleep in five mintues.

Oishi went to sleep after awhile too, only to wake up in the next chapter...

* * *

SPECIAL: Seimi and Saki's internet conversation, filled with inside jokes and 1337!

If you don't want to read it press 'end' on your keyboard, cause there's a little review button there waiting for you to click it.

**Saki-chaaan says:**  
ZOMG! SEIMI!  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
nani?  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
KAWAMURA-SEMPAI!!!  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
...What about him?  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
Squee!  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
Saki-chan  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
calm down  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
tell me happened  
**Saki-chaaan says:  
**OKAY.  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
Gah. stupid caps lock  
**Saki-chaaan says:  
**Taka-san called me 'baby' today. drool  
**Seimi-chan says:  
**...And?  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
I feel happy, oh so happy, I feel happy and sappy and YAY!!!  
**Seimi-chan says:  
**Happy and sappy and...  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
YAY!!!  
**Seimi-chan says:  
**cappy!  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
(As in caps lock)  
**Saki-chaaan says:  
**THAT TOO!! LOL  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
anyway.  
**Saki-chaaan says:  
**Hows Kachiro?  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
sings Shutter Chance wa Ichido dake  
**Seimi-chan says:  
**Eh, Okay.Not quite Yuu-tan  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
He's got Yuuko and Yumeko tonight.  
**Saki-chaaan says:  
**you WOULD say that  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
say what?  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
Not quite Yuu-tan  
**Saki-chaaan says:  
**and that's a quote  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
ooohhhhhh...  
**Seimi-chan says:  
**Yeah  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
I would say that  
**Seimi-chan says:  
**And I did  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
and you did  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
lol zomg!  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
We're in Syncro!  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
I feel giddy, oh so giddy, I feel giddy and pretty and...  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
Take that, Golden Paring!  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
YAY!!  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
Oh  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
giddy and pretty and...  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
smitty!  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
don't ask. ummm...  
**Saki-chaaan says:  
**smutty!!  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
YEAH! SMUT  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
YES.  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
I heart smut  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
And Yuuta  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
But mostly Yuuta  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
I think...  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
yea. I heart smut too.  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
and Kawamura-sempai.  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
But which one more?  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
But mostly Kawamura-sempai.  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
kk  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
Because NO ONE TOPS AIBA OR TEZUKA  
**Seimi-chan says:  
**YEAH!  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
except Fuji  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
But everyone tops Kenn  
**Saki-chaaan says:  
**YUP  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
Kenn and his pink dress...  
**Seimi-chan says:  
**WHY?!  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
Why did they waste a perfect groping oppotunity?  
**Saki-chaaan says:  
** I don't know Seimi-chan  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
I don't know.  
**Seimi-chan says:  
**You don't know...  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
Lol. 6'2"  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
Tezuka...  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
yay, WoW!  
**Seimi-chan says:**  
bai-bai nows.  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
ZOMGFANGIRLSQUEE  
**Saki-chaaan says:**  
byebye


	3. Which involves puppy love and no logic

Mission: Egg Chapter 3 

Disclaimer: Ahem. Look at the summary. Do we sound creative enough to create PoT? We are merely borrowing the characters for our own sadistic pleasure. (ZOMG! Fuji's taken over Tasha's body!)

Author: BlackGold Ficcies Inc.

Rating: T+

Summary: The Seigaku Tennis Team regulars, ichinen trio, and some girls are assigned the infamous egg project! (insert corny horror music)

Warnings: CRACK! Shounen-ai, sugar-high authoresses, pointless fluff, death fic (with a twist), Fuji, OC's- NOT MARY-SUES! (They can't be, since they don't have too much personality in this ficlet.) First attempt at a PoT fic. Characters may--no--WILL be OOC.

Pairings implied: Golden pairing (duh!), TezuFuji (double duh!), InuiKai, RyoSaku, TakaOC (somewhat), One-sided KachiroOC (kawaii! -)

We say pairings implied, because we like these pairings, and hint at them continuously. We are very canonical fangirls, aren't we? And yes, we DO like het, too.

Angie: kk...I just woke up an hour or so ago...let's hope I'm coherent enough to type.

* * *

OISHI & EIJI 

Oishi woke up to find Eiji staring at him.

"Good morning, koi-chan!" Eiji glomped him.

Oishi smiled at him, "Good morning, Eiji. Shall we go get breakfast?" The answer was a bright smile followed by Eiji running to the door.

"Come on Shui-chan, hurry up! Don't you want breakfast too?"

"Eiji, I have to get dressed first." Eiji walked around the room and eventually flung some boxers at him.

"There you go. Put those on and hurry up! I'm going to go brush my teeth, nya!" And Eiji ran off to do just that, after kissing their Shuji-chan good morning. Oishi smiled (it's hard not to when Eiji's your boyfriend.) again and got up to get dressed properly. Oishi went downstairs with Shuji in the little fluffly basket they'd made for him. He had given Shuji-chan a good morning kiss already.

Eiji was half-heartedly poking at his omelette. "It was nice of Shuichiro's mom to make my favorite, but... I feel like I'm BETRAYING SHUJI-CHYAAAN!" Oishi's parents and younger sister (cute!) cocked their heads and turned to Oishi.

"Shuji-chan?" He explained their situation. Naru, Oishi's 5th-grade sister, squealed. "Aniki's a mommy! That's so cute!"

"Shuichiro, do you want Eiji-kun's omelette?" Asked his mom, who was getting a bowl of cereal for Eiji.

He looked over at his boyfriend still sobbing about Shuji-omelette, and said, "I think I'll have a bowl of cereal too"

* * *

SEIMI & KACHIRO 

"Takita-sempai?"

"Yes, Kachiro-kun?" She gave him a Fuji-smile. (A/N: Not a sadistic Fuji-smile, the regular one. Fuji smile is trademarked to Fuji, we don't own it.)

"I was thinking if we decorated the eggs, your grandmother would see that and not bake them." He was hoping it was a good plan. He didn't want to get on a sempai's bad side.

"True. I could keep them in my room so they'd be seperated from the baking eggs. Okay, let's do that! Good thinking Kachiro-kun!" She pulled out a pencil pack from her tennis bag. (They use those things like backpacks, has anyone else noticed that?)

She unzipped it, and put it between them. "Here, I'll decorate Yuuko, and you can do Yumeko, okay?"

_'Sempai is so nice...'_ He pulled a red marker out from her pencil pouch and started making the hair. _'Sempai is so pretty, it makes sense for Yumeko to have her pretty hair.'_ He blushed as he realized what he was thinking.

He looked over at her carefully drawing in details._ 'She really is pretty though...'_ And she was. The morning sun reflected off of her hair and skin at a nice angle, so she appeared to glow. Her eyes were bright and pretty, and...completely focused on her egg.

Kachiro blushed some more and turned around. He wasn't supposed get a crush on a sempai! Besides, didn't she like Fuji-sempai's younger brother?

"Done!" Kachiro was forcefully dragged out of his thoughts. He looked over at her. "Kachiro-kun, are you done yet? I need to get my things packed up soon..."

"Oh!" He quickly finished it up, so it was perfect combination of their physical traits. "Now I am. Here you go, Takita-sempai."

"Thank you " Seimi gathered her things up, and ran off, her pigtails and skirt flying behind her.

Needless to say, Kachiro found himself with a case of puppy love, and that image stuck in his head.

* * *

SAKI & TAKA 

Saki waited for Taka to get done with tennis practice near the door into the school. The girls always finished earlier than the guys, (to avoid multi-gender locker room use.) and she wanted to see her Suki again. She had even lined the box her new computer speakers had come in with pink cotton balls for her!

It looked like luck was on her side, since Taka-san walked out early. Yosh, now she wouldn't be late for class!

As she ran up to talk to him, Fuji walked out of the locker room. "Taka-san, you forgot this!"

_'Oh no, not the racket again! Not while he's holding Suki!'_ Saki winced, and then relaxed when she saw Fuji handing him an egg.

"She fell in with Fuka-chan and Mitsu-chan." He explained. Saki ran up just after Fuji left to go to class.

"Kawamura-sempai, I'll take Suki now." After she put Suki into her special little container, she asked: "Ne. Kawamura-sempai? Maybe I should come over tonight, so it'll be joint care, and I'll be doing more..."

"Uhh, sure. I'll be busy tonight helping my dad out, anyway." Taka-san scratched the back of his neck sheepishly.

"YAY! I LOVE Y--yo--oo--Umm, I mean, we should get to class. Baibai, Kawamura-sempai!"

* * *

MOMO & KAIDOH (Note: this takes place during the last class period) 

"Alright, this time I'll take Narumi and Kaira, and you'll take Yukie." Said Momo. They switched eggs, only to find that the other had decorated it as a feminine version of themselves.

"Teme! What have you done!"

"What have I done? What have YOU done? She looks ugly, like YOU!"

"This argument is all but mature, boys. Take your seats." Takeda-sensei ordered. "One by one, you will all come up here with your partners and child or children. Starting from Momoshiro-kun and Kaidoh-kun." She smiled as they slowly brought up Yukie, Kaira, and Narumi. They glared the whole time she was checking for cracks. "Oh! You two boys are SUCH good artists." She stood up.

"These are adorable aren't they, class?" She showed some students, all of which agreed.

"Shui-chan, they're cute, but not as much as Shuji, ne?"

"Aww, can you decorate mine?"

"I guess some people are blessed with drawing skills, luckies." (A/N: Hi Sengoku, I think they miss you at Yamabuki!)

"Kyaa! They're adorable!"

"SNAP that's good!"

Momo and Kaidoh were as pink-red as Marui's hair. Kaidoh ''Fshh'd'' and Momo laughed nervously, they were about to take their seats when they heard Takeda-sensei again.

"Oh, but, why isn't this one decorated?"

"Ehh...I fell asleep before I could get to doing her, too...I just did." Momo grinned, making a joke of his accident.

Kaidoh could be heard muttering: "And it's a good thing, too. Don't want two of them looking like freaks."

"Please decorate her, and put in BOTH of your traits this time. The other two look too much like one parent."

She got a joint answer of "...Hai, sensei"

* * *

TOMO & RYOMA 

Ryoma wished that Tezuka didn't give 50 laps for every day you skipped practice. If he skipped every day of this project...well, it lasted 6 days, one of which was a Sunday, so he'd have 250 laps by the end.

He didn't think he'd ever needed this much courage during any tennis game as he needed now.

Ryoma swallowed and walked up to Tomoka, who was talking to Sakuno...Sakuno in her short little tennis skirt...Ack, why was he thinking of that?

Sakuno noticed his presence first and shyly waved, right in the midst of him trying to imagine Ryuzaki-sensei in the shower. And failing, because she kept getting younger and looking exactly like Sakuno on him. Tomo noticed him, too."Kyaa, Ryoma-sama! Do you need something?"

"Y-yeah. take these." He handed her Ryou, Kisa, and Sadakou in a little basket his cousin so graciously made for him out of an old easter basket.

"Demo, Ryoma-sama, I think Takeda-sensei wants us to do as much joint care as possible! I'm sure your parents wouldn't mind me coming over after school!" Tomo protested unhappily.

"**They** wouldn't, but **I **would. Ja ne." Ryoma waved, and walked off to where the rest of the regulars were practicing.

That went better than he thought it would. At least now he could get back to tennis, his unnatural obsession. (A/N: Seriously, he plays tennis ALL THE FREAKIN TIME. Doesn't he have any hobbies?)

As he was walking to the locker rooms after practice, he observed Sakuno practicing against a wall again. When he got close, she said, "Ryoma-kun? I-I think that that was being a little mean to Tomo-chan. Even if you do think she's annoying, you could have been a bit more gentle..."

Seigaku's super rookie stared at her for a moment. Then he set off for the locker rooms with only an "I'll try." as an response.

* * *

SAKUNO (& KATSUO) 

Now that Sakuno had talked to Ryoma-kun about the incident with Tomo, she was free to go spend time with her own babies while Katsuo changed.

"Ne, how are you two doing in there?" She beamed at the two eggs in her own special container, a box that had once held a tennis ball, and had been cut so it was shorter, then lined with material from an old washcloth. To top it all off, Kumo and Taichi were blanketed with the ribbon from her school blouse.

It was her turn to take them home tonight, so she just had to change out of her tennis uniform, and get home.

Finally, when all that was done, she left the locker room to wait near the front gate, so she could catch a ride home with her grandma, who was later than usual.

And then, a new dilemma arose. Ryoma-kun had picked up Kumo from her box (which she'd put down outside when she went to change), and was looking at him kind of weird. 'Oh no, what if he sees that it looks like him?'

Ryoma-kun seemed to have just realized she was there, and blushed. "...Gomen ne." He muttered, handing the egg back to her.

"I-it's fine. Err, what were you looking at?"

"...It looks a bit like me, doesn't it?"

"U-un. Does it? W-we noticed that one of yours--Sadakou, I think--didn't look like you or Tomo-chan..."

Ryoma was thankfully saved from the embarrassment of answering by Ryuzaki-sensei pulling up to give Sakuno a ride home.

* * *

INUI (& HORIO) 

Inui went home with Satoshi in hand that night. He had secretly decorated both eggs as best he could to look like himself and his own love, under the excuse that good decoration meant sensei knew you were taking care of it. Besides, Horio couldn't tell, so harm done, right?

But as he sat down to start on homework, he couldn't help but think how illogical it was. How did Momo pick Kaidoh? If he had gone up before Momo, Kaidoh would have been his. He calculated the exact probability of himself getting Kaidoh. But then Momo got up faster than he could and picked Kaidoh's name.

Sometimes being tall has its disadvantages.

He sighed and tried to concentrate on his work, but Kaidoh and Momo kept coming back into his mind.

He needed some Inui juice. Maybe he can concentrate with that.

(A/N: We're sorry it's short, but Inui is hard to write as! I don't know how people ever RP him)

* * *

TEZUKA & FUJI 

"Kuni-chyaaan?"

A pause. "Yes, Shuusuke?"

"Why did you invite me over to your house?"

"Because... um..."

"Because you're sorry about yesterday?"

"Yes, Shuusuke. Because I'm VERY sorry about yesterday."

"Kuni-chyaaan?"

Tezuka sighed "Yes, Shuusuke?"

"Do I ask too many questions?" They were sitting on Tezuka's bed, and Fuji was slowly inching closer.

_'Tell the truth? Or lie?' _"Yes, Shuusuke. You certainly DO ask too many questions." _'Tell the truth'_

Fuji gave a bright Fuji-smile "Then I have one more question: Why don't you make me shut up?" Tezuka smirked and moved closer. Fuji tilted his head up, and then gasped.

"Wait, Kuni-chan!"

Tezuka's eyebrow twitched and he gritted his teeth."Yes, Fuji?"

"Not in front of the babies!"

And the third chapter ends with no action for our poor, poor Tezzie-chan.

* * *

Note: Again, Fuji-smile does not belong to us. It is trademarked to Fuji. 

In case you are lost, here are the 'couples' and their 'babies.'

Kikumaru and Oishi: Shuji

Taka and Saki: Suki

Fuji and Tezuka: Fuka and Mitsu

Katsuo and Sakuno: Kumo and Taichi

Tomo and Ryoma: Sadakou, Kisa, and Ryo

Kaidoh and Momo: Narumi, Yukie, and Kaira

Kachiro and Seimi: Yuuko and Yumeko

Inui and Horio: Satoshi and Shigeru

Angie: I like describing the containers because it just shows how much everyone loves their babykins! So yeah, if you were wondering why so much detail got put in there, that's why.

Now then. There's a review button down there. Itte yosh. (We just love the TezuFuji moments.)


	4. No! Not ANGST!

Mission: Egg Chapter 4 

Disclaimer: Ahem. Look at the summary. Do we sound creative enough to create PoT? We are merely borrowing the characters for our own sadistic pleasure. (ZOMG! Fuji's taken over Tasha's body!)

Author: BlackGold Ficcies Inc.

Rating: T+

Summary: The Seigaku Tennis Team regulars, ichinen trio, and some girls are assigned the infamous egg project! (insert corny horror music)

Warnings: CRACK! Shounen-ai, sugar-high authoresses, pointless fluff, death fic (with a twist), Fuji, OC's- NOT MARY-SUES! (They can't be, since they don't have too much personality in this ficlet.) First attempt at a PoT fic. Characters may--no--WILL be OOC. Angst. OH THE ANGST!

Pairings implied: Golden pairing (duh!), TezuFuji (double duh!), InuiKai, RyoSaku, TakaOC (somewhat), One-sided KachiroOC (kawaii! -), KatsuoKachiro later on.

C'mon people, 380+ hits, and only 2 reviews? That's like a review for every 190 hits! Geez, if we can get off our lazy butts to type, you can too! (And remember that reviewing is good advertising for your own stories, since we worship our reviewers )

And now:  
runningondreams: Yeah, sorry we're late replying. Sheer ridiculousness, ne? We've never had someone tell us that before, but we love you for it!

Sky Rose: It's actually supposed to jump from couple to couple, in order that the events happen. And I guess that neither one of us is in the correct mind set. BTW, Tasha loved Rivaled Kisses!

* * *

SAKI (& TAKA)

Saki awoke with a start. Where was she again? This room didn't look familiar.

_'Oh. That's right. I'm at Kawamura-sempai's house because it was too late for me to walk home by myself.'_ She frowned. _'He could have walked me home. It would have been nice to have a conversation other than about Suki, tennis, or sushi. And...'_ She blushed. _'I could have gotten a kiss on my doorstep!'_ She sighed.

Wait a minute. Lets rewind that. _'DoorstepmyonkissagottenhavecouldIand Sushiortennissukiaboutthanotherconversationahavetonicebeenhavewouldit. MyselfbyhomewalktomeforlatetoowasitbecausehouseKawamurasempai'satI'm. Right--'_

STOP!

PLAY!

_'--right. I'm at Kawamura-sempai's house.'_ PAUSE! ... _'Kawamura-sempai's house.'_ Oh. Em. Gee. She started to open her mouth to squee loudly, but then realized Taka, his younger sister (who must be TOTALLY adorable.), and parents might still be sleeping. She crept out of the room and squeed as quietly as she could.

Saki went back into Taka's sister's room. She was borrowing one of Taka's oversized shirts to sleep in, and she started to search for the school uniform she'd worn here.

The first thing she did when she found was sniff and check it for stains. Ehh, it could be reworn again today. She picked up Suki and her little container, and went downstairs to thank Taka and give him his shirt back before she left for school.

(3 Author's/Notes: 1. Just so ya'll know, Oishi and Taka really DO have younger sisters, but they never appear in the series. So we made up their names, okay? 2. Try saying 'Saki and Taka' 5 times fast. You'll say 'Saka and Taki' eventually. If we ever misspell it, that's why. 3. That backwards stuff is REALLY hard to write)

* * *

FUJI & TEZUKA

"Kuni-chyaaan?"

"...Syusuke. It's 7:30 in the morning. What could you possibly want?" Tezuka tried to glare at him, but ended up looking silly since he'd just got woken up.

"...My parents called. They've...found out. About me...and you."

"Didn't they already know you were gay?"

"Of course they did! They've always known; That's why Yuuta was born! They just didn't know that we were...You know.." Fuji made a vague hand gesture.

"...Doing it." Fuji explained.

"Ah. How did they come to that conclusion?" Tezuka was trying to stay calm.

"Ehehe...they found the lube I keep in the closet."

"I TOLD you that was a bad place for it."

"Where was I supposed to hide it? In Yuuta's room? I don't want to get HIM in trouble!"

"Well, I don't see what the problem is. We can't get pregnant or anything"  
( /Sequel hint: Or so you think, Tezzie-chan. Or so you think...Nfu fu fu fu! )

"No, they know that, but they just think it's a little early, and that I should've saved myself for marriage. I told them that we were getting married anyway, but--Ne, Kuni-chan?"

Tezuka sighed. "Yes, Syusuke, what is it?"

"Do you think I'd look good in Okaa-san's old wedding dress?"

"You can't wear it if it's white; that's for the people who did save themselves for marriage."

Fuji contemplated that. "Okaa-san was two months pregnant with Yumiko, though."

"Doesn't matter. Besides, it probably wouldn't fit you anyway"

* * *

HORIO (& INUI)

He should be paying attention to the English teacher, but Horio was Thinking for once. No, not about the uses of an adjective. About his future.

Wow. That's some pretty deep shit considering it's Horio we're talking about.

If two little eggs were hard to take care of, imagine what it would be like with actual kids! And a wife!... A wife. Hmm... what would his wife be like?

In the midst of thinking of his fantasy girlfriend/wife/significant other, he is called on to answer a question. Let us watch and be amused as the teacher yells at an unconcious kid.

Horio finally woke up, only to find his english teacher standing with his arms crossed, and his eyebrow twitching. "Horio. Go sit in the hall before I lose my patience. Itte yosh."

Once in said hallway, Horio continued thinking. (Do you smell something burning?) Seriously, what kind of girl would his wife be?

She'd have to be nice. That was a given. And she'd need to appreciate his...actually by the time he was old enough to get married, he'd have 8 years of tennis experience! And she'd be really shy and pretty. He thought maybe she'd play sports a bit, so their kids would be great athletes. Horio had once seen a picture of a girl with pink hair and blue eyes on a magazine cover, and he thought she was pretty. His wife would look like that. Yeah.

But she could NOT be bossy. He was going to be the man of the house, not her. She'd just be sweet and completely dependant on him. And they'd have two kids, one of each gender.

The girl would act a lot like her mother, and be very pretty, but she wouldn't be interested in dating any boys. Oh no, Horio's daughter would excel academically and be very smart. She'd marry eventually, of course, and her father would approve the boy.

And his son would be a tennis star, who was the captian of the Seigaku tennis team. And Echizen's kid wouldn't make the regulars team...Yeah, that's great. But then he supposed he should be realistic. Okay, fine, his son had a weakness in schoolwork. But his aneki helped him along, so all was well!

And then the bell rang, and Horio darted back into the room to grab his stuffs, and get to his next class.

* * *

EIJI (& OISHI)

Eiji stared in dismay at his lunch. The school was serving hamburgers, which he liked, but the omelet incident had got him thinking. This was some animal's little baby!

Eiji poked it with a fork. Should he eat it? Maybe Fujiko would know...

"Fujiko-chan?"

Fuji wore his usual unreadable smile. "Yes, Eiji?"

"I was saying to Oishi yesterday how it felt like I was betraying Shujiko-chan by eating an omelette, so I wasn't going to eat them anymore, but then I thought...This hamburger is some poor animal's little baby, too! I wouldn't like it if Shuji got eaten, so why am I eating someone else's baby!" Eiji ranted to his friend.

"Hmm...maybe you should become a vegetarian, Eiji?"

"Nya, but Fujiko, how would I do my acrobatic play if I were a vegetable? I don't think they can even move or think..."

"A vegetarian, not a vegetable. A vegetarian is someone who doesn't eat meat."

Eiji brightened up. "Hoi, that's a great idea!" Fuji was about to eat the rest of his lunch, but Eiji stopped him. "Fujiko-chan! I can't believe you'd do that when you're the one with TWO kids!"

Fuji sighed as he put his food back down, and then smiled at Eiji. "Then shall we become vegetarians together?"

"Hoi! Let's do that, then!"

Fuji continued smiling as he dipped the vegetables provided with the school lunch into his wasabi.

* * *

TOMO (& RYOMA)

Tomo was sitting by herself, but she wasn't screaming for Ryoma-sama or Sakuno to come sit with her. Oh no, she was scheming.

Sakuno had offered her 500 yen to watch Kumo and Taichi while she practiced. Tomo knew that Tezuka-buchou was getting impatient with the way some of the regulars (Fuji-sempai and Kikumaru-sempai especially) doted on their egg-babies.

So Tomo was formulating a plan for...DAYCARE SERVICE!

Yes that's right, daycare service for eggs. Everyone else except her had tennis practice everyday before and after school. It was perfect! Only...she didn't know how much to charge.

Ryoma-sama had their own egg-babies with him, so she was cuddling Sakuno's two boys since they weren't around. Should Sakuno get a discount charge, for the inspiration? (And because they're friends?)

But, But...what if no one needed daycare? And what if they all eventually went broke and couldn't pay her? Why was she thinking this? Sakuno was the smart one!

Tomo shrugged it off and began making a sign.

At the very end, she had a sign that said "Eggsitting by Tomo-chan!" in big red letters. Under that, in smaller purple letters, it read "250 yen per hour." and her phone number and address. The sign was decorated with little eggs in blue and pink clothes.

And with that, Tomo ran off to advertise her new business.

* * *

SEIMI & KACHIRO

"Takita-sempai?"

"Nyu? What do you want?" Seimi turned around to face him and cocked her head confusedly.

Kachiro looked down shyly, (A/N: CYUUUTTE!) "Wo-would you um... Like to go somewhere? Um, I mean on Sunday? With... me? " Oh, Kachiro. You tomato, you!

She pulled a little black leather booklet from her tennis bag. "Hmm... I have plans with someone that Sunday." She flipped the page, "How about next Sunday?"

Kachiro didn't know whether to be happy (she offered for a different time) or depressed. (She offered because she already had plans with someone ELSE.)

"Kachiro-kun?" He snapped out of his thoughts. Yeah. He should probably answer her question, before she walked away.

"U-un. Takita-sempai? Do you mind if I ask who you have plans WITH?"

"Nope! Go right ahead and ask!" (A/N: Wow. Just... wow.)

"... Who do you have plans with?" _'Please say your brother, please say your brother...'_

"I have plans with..." she paused for dramatic effect, "Yuu-tan. All I did was tell him there's free pie! You'd be surprised at what a sweet tooth he is under all that 'I hate Aniki' exterior."

"Free pie?"

"Just for me and him," she thought about that. Then she added, "...and whoever he brings along." She hoped it wasn't Mizuki-san this time. There was something about him that made her hate him with every fiber of her being. "Why, did you want free pie, too?"

Kachiro blinked at her. It was wrong to think of a sempai as dense, even though she had good grades in school, but... How could she NOT see it by now!

"Maybe next Sunday"

* * *

KATSUO (& SAKUNO)

"Katsuo! Kachiro-kun is on the phone for you!" Katsuo had been in the middle of his homework when his mother, Mizuno Maruko, called up to him. Of course, homework can wait when one's crush/best friend is on the phone for you.

Ah yes. Katsuo had had a crush on Kachiro since he first talked to him in grade school. It was love at first sight. Almost. Okay, love at, like, sixth sight, but anyway.

"Ah, moshi moshi, Kachiro."

"Takita-sempaaiii"

"Eh? What about her?" Katsuo had a feeling that he wasn't going to like it, whatever it was...

Kachiro told of the conversation with Seimi and his crush on her. Katsuo was glad that Kachiro couldn't see his face because he was close to crying.

He wiped the tears that were burning under his eyelids. "Maybe you should give up on her. Doesn't she like Fuji-sempai's little brother?" He hoped he didn't sound too desperate, and if he did, his friend didn't notice.

"Maybe I should, but..." There was a pause on the other side.

'But what, Kachiro?' He thought. 'You'll end up being rejected and hurt. I don't want you to get hurt.' The tears came back.

"But I can't HELP it! Under all that density, she's really nice, and sweet, and pretty! Well, she's pretty ABOVE all that density, too, but still."

"Remember Kachiro, beauty is only skin deep. Maybe it's just a physical crush." Because, for crying out loud, that girl had, like, the BIGGEST chest in the eighth grade.

"Katsuo-kuuun?" Crap. He was about to ask a favor. "Could you, um..." He heard Kachiro gulp on the other line, "Could you talk to Takita-sempai? Find out what she likes in a guy?"

"You mean it's not obvious what kind of guy she likes? Act like Fuji-sempai's younger brother and you'll be fine." He thought he sounded a bit harsh. But he was angry, dammit! Why did Kachiro continue to chase after a girl who is too damn clueless to realize he likes her, even though the guy makes it so blindingly obvious? Why was Kachiro coming to HIM, of all people, for help with a crush? It's not like he'd ever dated a girl, much less LIKED one. He was crying now. So many questions presented themselves and he wanted answers. NOW. But it's not like he could straight up ask Kachiro what kind of guy HE liked.

"Katsuo...? What's wrong?" Kachiro sounded concerned, but like he had been crying too.

"Why, Kachiro? Why do you continue talking to me as if I didn't get mad at you?"

"Why are you mad at me?" There were choked sobs on the other line. "Katsuo, why?" They were practically shouting at each other now.

"Nothing." He sighed and collected his breath."I'll talk to Takita-sempai for you. " He promptly hung up and went to bed.

Maruko wanted to know what all the shouting was for and came up to her son's room. Only to find he was already in bed asleep. She'd ask in the morning. He looked as if her son had been crying. She lightly kissed his forehead and murmured a good night to him. As she left, she wondered if he and Kachiro-kun had gotten in a fight. Her son had loved Kachiro for a long time, she didn't want them to fight now. She turned back to the closed door and whispered, "Keep fighting Katsuo."

In the midst of Katsuo's dreams, he smiled.

* * *

Another special chat, but with me and Tashy this time.

**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin)/Angie says:  
**Gawd, got enough angst there? They're only 12!  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS/Tasha says:**  
I don't know.  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
...aren't you answering?  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:**  
Daniel's pissing me off  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
Sorrys  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**But. It's going to be cute eventually.  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:**  
**You know that.  
YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
duh  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**Me too!  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
OISHI  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
you too what?  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**I want my money back too  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
high school never ends!  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**what did you say?  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
Seigaku are strawberry hottiemuffins!  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:**  
yell  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**YUPYUP  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**anyways.  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**pulls string on mizuki plushie's back Ne, Yuuta-kun?  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**Open up cracky brainstorm  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**make me  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**pulls string on mizuki plushie's back Nfu steals mizuki plushie and pulls string Purple Ghei Powers, **YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**steals mizuki plushie and pulls string Purple Ghei Powers, ACTIVATE!  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**Shiozawa Hidaemasa and Akira Ishida are AWESOME  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**confused yet?  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
dunno who the first one is  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**but the other is PGF  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**Tenimyu actor. Akira Ishida is the voice actor. Not the purple ghei faerie  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**i know THAT  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**that's what I meant  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**oh  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**I SO knew that  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**I want to run away with Mzuki's voice  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**lol  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**It's better with it's hands than he is.  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
Nfu  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**NOL  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**wtf?  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
Nfu + lol?  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**N Nfu O out L Loud  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**Nfu out loud  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**nmao!  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:**  
We are the QUEENS of acronyms  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**hell yeahZ!  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:**  
NOL  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**I'm bored.  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:**  
Metoonfu  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**metoonfu?  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**peter griffin laugh shweet.  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**wtf is that?  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**hey  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
Listen  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**It' headstrong!  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:**  
m.e.t.o.o.n.f.u  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**that.  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
Now GO!  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**Go where?  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**GO AND PLAY DONKEY KONGA 2 TO YOUR HEART'S CONTENT!  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:**  
oh.  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:**  
Nah. I'm good  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**I'm hungry.  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
O  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**K **YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**Let me rephrase that  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**rephrase what?  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**GO AND PLAY DONKEY KONGA 2 TO YOUR HEART'S CONTENT, AND LEAVE ME ALONE!  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:**  
oh.  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**Cos I'm tired  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**you're mean.  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**and I have smut to read  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**and PSATs to study for  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**ooo.. about smut.  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:**  
nighty-night  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**not psats  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**Ja ne  
**YIARSM (Yuuta is a Raspberry SweetieMuffin) says:  
**don't let the mizukis bite  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:  
**Mizuki's don't bite GIRLS.  
**SWEET MUFFIN OF TENNIS! says:**  
I'll leave you alone now. Oyasumi.

Okay. That was a weird conversation. Then again, we ARE weird people. So ya. REVIEW PLEASE!


	5. The WHAT Faerie?

Mission: Egg Chapter 5 

Disclaimer: Ahem. Look at the summary. Do we sound creative enough to create PoT? We are merely borrowing the characters for our own sadistic pleasure. (ZOMG! Fuji's taken over Tasha's body!)

Author: BlackGold Ficcies Inc.

Rating: PG-15

Summary: The Seigaku Tennis Team regulars, ichinen trio, and some girls are assigned the infamous egg project! (insert corny horror music)

Warnings: CRACK!!!! Shounen-ai, sugar-high authoresses, pointless fluff, death fic (with a twist), Fuji, OC's- NOT MARY-SUES!!! (They can't be, since they don't have too much personality in this ficlet.) First attempt at a PoT fic. Characters may--no--WILL be OOC.

Pairings implied: Golden pairing, TezuFuji, InuiKai, RyoSaku, TakaOC (somewhat), One-sided KachiroOC, KatsuoKachiro later on.

WTFH?! We type until our eyes and necks ache from too long on the computer, and what do we get? 530+ hits, sure, but what we really want are reviews. Reviews are what keeps us going in everything, otherwise, we'd go into suicidally depressed emo-mode.

Now then:

Sakura Angel 4eva: Thank you for the review! ZOMG! A non-yaoi (or shounen-ai) fan likes our story! Yay!! Here's your update, our wonderful friend!

* * *

TEZUKA & FUJI

"Kuni-chyaaan?" Tezuka sighed. Why did they have to go through this every chapter?

"Yes, Shuusuke?"

"When we have babies together, will you love them more than me?" What is he supposed to say to that? Hmm... Perfect answer!

"Boys can't get pregnant, Shuusuke."

"But the Purple Ghei Faerie can help us!"

"... The WHAT?" Fuji looked dissapointed.

"The Purple Ghei Faerie! He gives men wombs and ovaries along with the Pink Ghei Faerie and the Golden Ghei Faerie so that men can have babies too!" Tezuka wondered where Fuji had heard that. He wasn't sure he wanted to know.

* * *

Meanwhile, somewhere far, far away, Mizuki sneezed.

And then Niou sneezed.

And then Atobe did, too.

* * *

"So, Kuni-chyaaan... You never answered my question...!"

"It depends."

"And what does it depend ON, Koi-chyaaan?" Tezuka shuddered. He hated that nickname even more than 'Kuni-chan.'

"It depends on if I have to be pregnant, and if they ask as many questions as you."

Fuji pouted, "I don't ask THAT many questions." A pause. "Do I?"

Tezuka began looking around for something large and heavy to bang his head against. Finding nothing, he sighed. Does he really have to answer that?

"Koi-chyaaan?"

"What do you want, Shuu-CHAN." It was more of an order than a question. He was tempted so very badly to call Fuji a worse name, but, somehow, he restrained himself. He KNEW another question was coming up.

And he was right. "Have you noticed we're getting close to school?"

* * *

SEIMI & KACHIRO / SAKUNO & KATSUO

Katsuo was just handing Kumo and Taichi to Sakuno to take care of, when he happened to see Seimi. Right, he needed to have that talk with her soon.

"I'll see you later, Ryuzaki." She nodded and went off, while Katsuo walked up to Seimi.

"Takita-sempai...?"

She turned around and smiled happily. "Ah, hello, Katsuo-kun! Did you need something?" At this, Katsou's plan faltered a bit. She was just too nice. And dense. She probably didn't even realize that Kachiro liked her! They should start with that.

"Takita-sempai...Do you know that Kachiro likes you?" He asked suddenly.

"Well, I hope he likes me. I want to be his friend after all... What? Does he not like me?" She certainly IS dense.

"No. I mean, like, he LIKE likes you... you know. Like, you know. A crush."

Seimi blinked. "Is that all?" Her eyes went into horseshoes and she patted Katsuo on the head. "Oh Katsuo. You silly boy! I've always known that!" She laughed.

"And you know that I... er... um--" He was cut off.

"Have a crush on Kachiro? Oh you silly, _silly_ boy! You're even more obvious than Eiji-sempai was before he and Oishi-sempai hooked up!"

"The Golden Pair... they're dating each other?" And people call HER dense. How dare those authoresses!

"But that's not the point right now. The point is you like Kachiro and I like Yuuta and we're about to be late for morning tennis practice!"... O.O "Wait. YOU'RE about to be late for practice! Ja ne!" And with that she took off running.

"WAIT!" She looked back. "So, you only pretend to be dense?"

She winked at him. "Maybe! You might want to hurry up! Itte yosh!" She started running again leaving Katsuo standing where he had been until he realized he was late for practice.

When he got there, he saw Kachiro and Horio talking.

Kachiro saw him, gathered his breath, and walked up to him. "So, Katsuo-kun... Did you talk to her?" Katsuo nodded. As he was about to make something up to tell Kachiro, Tezuka interrupted.

"Katou! Mizuno! Stop chatting! Twenty laps!" They took off running, and somehow (telepathically) decided to chat about it that night after school instead of facing Buchou's wrath.

* * *

INUI & HORIO

Inui was confused. This was rare. Why was Inui confused? Well, we'll tell you. Several odd things that his data couldn't predict happened.

For one: Katsuo and Kachiro were acting awkward as they were running laps. Percentage they want to say something to each other: 89.6

For two: The Golden Pair and Kachiro had sneezed several times this morning. Chance there's a bug going around: 48 Chance somebody was talking about them: 52 .

For three: Seimi ran up to Sakuno on the other courts saying "Sakuno-chan! I'm a wonderful matchmaker!" Percentage he wanted to know what she was talking about: 100.1 Chance he'd actually find out: 32.4 .

For Four: Fuji was trying to get, quite a red-faced (embarrassment, or anger?), Tezuka to kiss-- oh. Wait. That always happened. Nevermind.

He looked over at his health class partner. Horio was picking up balls, holding the box that contained Satoshi and Shigeru. As usual, Inui watched over the regulars, looking for any sign of weakness or good data. Seeing almost none, (besides the fact that Fuji and Eiji have been cooing over their eggs,) he looked back to check on Satoshi and Shigeru. Horio was not holding them anymore.

They were not on the bench.

They were not in the locker room.

He checked nearly everywhere, before giving up and asking. "Horio. Where are the eggs?" Not that he cared about the eggs, or felt any attachment to them. Oh, no. He just didn't want to get a bad grade. Yes. That's it.

"I gave them to her," he pointed somewhere behind him, "to babysit. Why, Inui-sempai?"

He shook his head and looked where the younger boy had pointed. Tomo was waving a sign around to advertise her new business. The eggs that had already been given to her to babysit were sitting in a carriage beside her. Well, at least they looked safe.

* * *

TOMO (& RYOMA)

"But Kuni-chyaaan! Why?" Tomo looked in the direction the voice was coming from. It was... Fuji-sempai? It sounded like he and Tezuka-san were arguing.

"Because, Fuji, these eggs are clouding your thoughts. You're not focusing on tennis practice, and they're JUST eggs." He sounded calm as always, Fuji-sempai looked devastated. They were right in front of her.

'_This should be good._' Tomo thought to herself.

"You're just mad cuz you didn't get any!" Tezuka stopped in his tracks. "They're not JUST eggs, they're the culmination of our LOVE!! If you can't accept that, I'll... I'll leave you and go to Saeki!!" A few of the people looked over, everyone else continued like it was normal.

And it pretty much WAS normal. Fuji always threatened that when he was pissed at Tezuka.

Tezuka looked as if he was ignoring it, and gave Fuka and Mitsu to Tomo. "I trust you'll take care of them?" He sounded the slightest bit nervous and in a hurry to Tomo, but she didn't question it. Instead, she nodded and told them not to worry. She'd protect them, eggs or not, with her life.

The unspoken part of her thoughts was that she'd protect them because she was afraid of the pain Fuji-sempai would inflict on her.

She watched as Tezuka grabbed Fuji by the arm and led him into the clubhouse. She blushed and smiled. She set Fuka and Mitsu down gently in the carriage and smiled.

'_I wonder what my future will be like... Everyone **BUT** Ryoma-sama knows that he and Sakuno were practically made for each other. But I can't be seen through. When those two finally DO get together, I have to at least act surprised. For a while._'

She glanced at the tennis courts. Horio-kun, Katsuo-kun, and Kachiro-kun were running laps because they angered Arai-sempai. The regulars were practicing. She looked at the three ichinen running again. Horio was bragging, again, about his two years of tennis experience. '_Ugh. He's SO annoying. I can barely stand to **look** at him._'

She grimaced and looked back at the carriage. Fuka, Mitsu, Shigeru, Satoshi, Sadakou, Ryou, Kisa, Taichi, and Kumo were all sitting there. She, again checked for cracks or any sort of harm. None.

Her eyes drifted back to Horio, who was done with his laps. She got annoyed with herself this time. Why did she keep looking at him? Kuso.

* * *

KIKUMARU & OISHI (around lunch-time)

"Shui-chan!!" shouted everyone's favorite red-head. "Guess what today is!"

Oishi sighed. "Saturday?" He was right, it was Saturday. But he knew the real answer that Eiji wanted.

"Today is the day we protest about eating meat in the cafeteria!" He sounded so bubbly but then he frowned. "Fuji is supposed to be helping though. I wonder where he is..." It was then that Fuji decided to show up behind him. His hair was disheveled, some buttons were in the wrong buttonhole, and his cheeks were flushed.

"Sorry I'm late, I had to... talk to Tezuka-buchou..." He grinned. As he talked to them, Oishi could've sworn he saw something white on the side of his mouth.

"Um, Fuji? You have something on your cheek..."

Eiji stared at Fuji, completely shocked. "Fuji!" Oishi mirrored Eiji's expression of suprise. Was Eiji going to chew him out in public for doing _that_? "You ate without us, didn't you? And you had mayonnaise! And mayonnaise comes from eggs! Fuji, how could you?!?!" Oishi and Fuji gave an internal sigh of relief.

"Gomen, Eiji; I must not have been thinking. I'll go wipe it off." Fuji turned around and licked the 'mayonnaise' off as soon he was out of sight. He continued walking for the bathroom, since it would look like he'd really gone to the bathroom and wiped it off if he took longer. (And besides, he could get any he missed now.)

Meanwhile, Eiji crossed his arms and pouted. "That Fuji. That could have been Fuka and Mitsu's sibling, Oishi! Can you believe it?" He flailed his arms around uselessly.

Oishi sighed. "No, I can't believe it, Eiji." Sighing and agreeing seemed to be the best method of making his boyfriend be quiet.

"Alright then!" Eiji climbed onto a table and stood up. Oishi handed him one of the signs that said '_Think_ _of the animals!_' and tried to appear invisible while his lover started shouting out animal-rights-protesty things.

* * *

KAIDOH & MOMO (during the actual lunch hour)

Our two ninen boys (whom we forgot to include in the last chapter) were 'quietly' sitting on the roof were trying to take their sensei's advice and decorate Kaira to look like both of them, but...

"Teme! You made her eyes too big!"

"Yeah, well you made the hair too short!"

It was not going too well. They were constantly arguing about this and that. Despite all this, Kaira was coming out to be a very kawaii little egg; She had huge, shiny purple eyes, like Momo. And pretty, shiny black hair in the same style as Kaidoh's.

"Well then make it longer!"

"I will! Give it to me, Mamushi!" Momo grabbed for Kaira, but Kaidoh still had a firm grip on her. So, Momo grabbed Kaidoh's wrists and squeezed which made him loosen his grip-- which does work, by the way --and therefore made Kaidoh drop Kaira.

Then Momo, with his "number one in Seigaku" tennis reflexes, grabbed the bandana from his partner's head and used it as a little security blanket to catch her. Momoshiro grinned as he basked in glory and relief.

"What do you think, Mamushi? Pretty cool or what?"

"Baka! The egg could've broken! Quit being so reckless!"

Kaidoh 'fshuuu'ed and took his bandana back after picking Kaira up and cradling her gently in one hand. He drew in a nose and made the hair a little longer. Momo watched and nodded in silent approval.

Right after Kaidoh finished drawing in the small smile, they both remained silent. It IS, after all, rather hard to express the feeling "OMG that's friggin' adorable! X3" in front of your rival and still pretend to be badass around them the next day.

We really did try this. It works. Ouch! Dammit Angie!

* * *

(SAKI &) TAKA (after school at Kawamura Sushi)

"It's all right, Saki. I can take care of Suki by myself... Yes. I'm sure. Good luck with your siblings then... Uh-huh. Bye."

"Who was that, Takashi? Your girlfriend isn't coming over tonight?" His father asked.

"She's not my girlfriend!" Taka called as he hung the phone up. "Just my partner in an embarrassing health project..."

After the last customer had left, Taka said goodnight to his father and retreated to his room. His homework was only half completed, and he still needed to excercise for an hour at least. (A/N: drool Without his shirt on. drools onto Angie)

It was almost midnight when he finished exercising. He was barely tired, though. He looked at the egg sitting in the container Saki made. He smiled. She's so kawaii!

He was thinking that Suki--beloved--was a great name for it, as he cradled it in his hands. It wouldn't be so bad to have a daughter when he grew up.

And of course, a son too. To take over the restaraunt. Maybe the daughter-- no. Maybe Suki would be a waitress or something.

And Saki-chan made a great mother-figure too. He supposed it was from all the time she spent with her siblings. Like tonight, for example. All of her older siblings were either working, at cram school, or shut up in their rooms studying to be a... What was it again? Oh, right. A professional Go player.

Taka figured he should go to bed. He tried, and failed to do so because he felt it necessary to check up on Suki every 10 minutes or so.

Or maybe, if this is what taking care of a baby is like. There might only be room for ONE child in his house.

* * *

Alrighty then! The whole Purple Ghei Faerie thing was a bit of an inside joke at first. Someone called Mizuki the Purple Ghei Man. We took it a step UP and called him the Purple Ghei Faerie. And decided he would give wombs and ovaries to gay men so they can have babies.  
And then we saw Niou's pink ponytail holder and decided to call him the PINK Ghei Faerie. (But now there's two "PGF's")  
And Finally we said "Hey, you know what? We have a name for all of the buchou's in PoT except for Atobe." Thus, he became the GOLDEN Ghei Faerie (cuz he's rich.)

And then, we thought, "What about the gay women?" SO, the Purple Ghei Faerie (and his two colleagues) magically somehow fertilize a gay woman's egg.

After writing this chapter, we've come to the conclusion that we really don't dislike anyone (significant) in PoT. We like Tomo because if she's got no other good qualities, she's a good friend to Sakuno, at least. We like the Ichinen trio because we're comedy suckers. We even like Hanamura because even though she creeps us out, she also cracks us up!

THERE! 2,600 words of what we hope is good reading. Now REVIEW!


End file.
